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[Posted by E&C on 29 Aug 2010 08:07 am]
Before I say anything else, let me say that I love me some Lord of the Rings. It's true. After watching the theatrical releases, my first thought was, "If only they were longer!" So, I bought the extended editions. I love them. About once a year, I'll watch six or eight hours a night for eight or nine weeks, then I'll move on to The Two Towers and so on. Who knew how entertaining it could be to watch two mildly homosexual midgets with hairy feet walk for unending hours? I certainly didn't.
I wanted to make my love for the trilogy clear before this next part. I have never and will never attempt to speak elvish, learn the complicated history of a fictional world, or exchange recipes on message boards for lembas bread. I will not call my wife "Arwen" in bed. I will not call E "Legolas" in bed. And I will not, in no uncertain terms, ever ever ever wear a battle axe, dragon claw, or other fantasy fanboy bling around my neck. Why? Because being entertained by a movie is one thing. Wanting to forsake your own life for an escapist reality is something else entirely. And as fun as it sounds fighting hordes of orcs and disembodied evilness, there's a real world that demands real heroics. If you want a life of epic adventure, try joining the PeaceCorps, volunteering for a political campaign, clothing orphans in Moldova, or yelling at people who preach via their webcomic. Where the hell did my point go?
Oh yeah. Come back to reality, won't you?
C
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